The things that stay with you

I’m having one of those weeks as a parent that aren’t so fun. We had to have a hard conversation with one of the kids about commitment and effort. We all walked away feeling a little beat up afterwards. (Though I’m sure said child feels like the parents did not feel bad at all… I probably would have felt that way were the roles reversed.)

The lingering after affects involve a bad attitude, curt responses and some definite snark. One of those snarky comments surprised me and made me think “THAT’S what was taken away from our conversation???” THAT wasn’t the intent. And as a communicator I can’t get that out of my head – I must not have communicated clearly enough. (Or we acknowledge that I was communicating with a teen and that’s a whole different animal.)

And then I got to thinking…. what are the things that stayed with me from past constructive criticisms?

There’s always going to be a filter when people are trying to tell us how to do something better. It’s hard to take criticism. The times that I’ve been able to do so with grace have been good learning experiences. The other times (the many other times), still make me angry. Sometimes angry at myself. The ability to learn from criticism and make positive changes is a hard lesson to learn and like many of life’s hard lessons, it often has to come from a parent first.

But that doesn’t make it any fun for any of us. I need a drink…

 

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2 thoughts on “The things that stay with you

  1. I made two students cry this week. Although I don’t have to live with them, the snarky comments and the eye rolling is still there, but in the end, it’s all done out of love and we can only hope they’ll get that someday.

  2. My oldest would always overreact to these types of conversations when she was in HS. but ignoring it doesn’t make it better either. Good luck.

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